Through my studies I became less sure that Jesus was 100% responsible for my sins instead of believing more strongly. I still had a problem understanding why that Jesus was hung on the cross and how could this blood wash away my sins. Did this mean that Jesus was God or greater than God? Some people have even told me that Jesus was God in the Flesh. If this were so then why did Jesus Pray to God for so many hours, sometimes all night. I read in the KJV of the Bible that Jesus was hanging on the cross and in the last hours of his life he cried out to God. How could Jesus do this if he were God in the flesh as so many have tried to teach me? I love and respect Jesus as being born with the knowledge of Gods will. How could he ever doubt God? I began to doubt that it was Jesus who was actually on the cross. The other reason I doubted this is his apostles. These men were willing to lay down their lives for Jesus. They had already put themselves before great multitudes with Jesus and were not afraid to say they believed in what he taught. Yet when Jesus was to be crucified the Bible tells that they denied they even knew who he was. Maybe it was because they did not know the man in question.

I do believe with all of my heart that Jesus did ascend into heaven to be with God. I also believe without a doubt that Jesus will come back before the end of times and show the people what they have been doing wrong. I also believe that The God sent a type of spirit into the world after Jesus left to take his place until his return. This spirit whether it is an angel or some other creation I do not know. But I believe all those that pray and love God will find its spiritual guidance. It will comfort you in times of sorrow and guide and remind you that all things belong to God.

Luke 11:13
If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children: how much more shall your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to them that ask him?

I accepted that I should follow Jesus and pattern my life after that which I learned about Him from the Bible, but not worship him.

What I Do Believe..
a. I believe that there is One And Only One God For All Of Creation
b. I believe in the existence of angel's
c. I believe in the religious scriptures
d. I Believe in the prophets i.e. Moses, Noah, Jesus … and all men that had brought messages from God before
e. I believe in the Day of Judgment when all men would have to answer to God for their sins that had not been forgiven. "God is most merciful and often forgiving if you only ask."
f. I believe in the decree of providence, that if God says something to be, it will be that way. I believe that the will of God supersedes all of creation.
g. I believe in the Ten Commandments.

I pray to God to guide me and direct my life. When I did things that were wrong I would pray to God for forgiveness as Jesus had taught according to the KJV. I was not 100% sure about the accuracy of the Bible. Part of my doubts about the perfection of the Bible came from the fact that it was translated by a group of men long, long… after the deaths of the authors and the people mentioned therein. I also can not forget the fact that the very people whom guarded the very scripts that the Bible was created from were enemies of the teachings of Jesus from the beginning. The Roman catholics in the beginning were walking two sides of the fence. One side was to please God. The other side was to please the Roman government, and in those days you did not oppose the government or you might lose your head. The Roman government acknowledged and supported the belief in many Gods, so they were not too concerned when Christians wanted to bring in one more. But they were concerned if the teachings of this new religion taught anything contrary to the governments power. If just for an example say the Romans crucified the wrong man instead of Jesus, could the church ever publicize this or keep any document that supported it? Even more to the point what would the US government do today if they were to execute an enemy of the government or terrorist and instead killed an innocent man in a big public display. Would they gladly reveal the truth even if say it was the president whom was the person making the mistake. I know nothing like that could ever happen because the US government is perfect, isn't it? The idea that the government even today keeps secrets from its supporters would be absurd. Conspiracy and cover ups never happen, or do they?